Subject: Re: Girls in Magic Date: Mon, 15 Jun 1998 10:42:38 +1000 From: Darryl Greensill To: "'fkusumot@ix.netcom.com.'" Personally, I have always thought that the outcome of a game of Magic was based on three things: luck, play skill, and deck design skill. Neither skill is restricted to any particular race, gender, culture, physical appearance, whatever; they are limited only by various kinds of intelligence. Thus my game vs an opponent is a contest of these three factors, and if my opponent's measure of any one or more of the three exceeds mine by a large enough margin, he or she will win the game. If I made errors that I am aware of, I should correct them in future games (thus my skills should increase). Since my skills are under my own control, I am free to blame myself for my mistakes, but I should not do so to such an extent that it puts me off the next game. If my opponent wishes to give me advice or suggestions, I am free to decide whether or not to take it and thus add to or subtract from my skills as appropriate. The same goes for any advice I give my opponent. However, fundamentally I can't really choose how my opponent looks and behaves. I have the right to form whatever opinion I wish of his/her play, appearance, manners, vocabulary, dental hygiene, etc (no doubt he/she has formed an opinion of mine); but I do *not* have the right to harm that person. Doing harm includes comments or behaviour intended to distress, upset or anger someone. I might, from ignorance, make a remark which *does* distress the person, but I do consider it that person's responsibility to tell me; what other people think of me is none of my business unless they choose to make it so. If people say or do something that bothers me, *I choose* how to react. "You made me ..." is a cop-out, a sign of moral weakness. (Rather a lot of people are morally weak. This doesn't excuse you and me.) If I meekly turn the other cheek, complain to the judge, retort sarcastically, physically attack the offender, or write up a nasty report for the Net afterwards, it is *my* responsibility. So what has this to do with the topic: basically, you should not assume that everyone is going to be nice to you, or nasty, because you are a girl. If they are nice or nasty to you, it is their responsibility, and your option how you react. People will be nicer to you, in general, if you are nicer to them; but if they are not, it is not your fault. Being *too* nice: if you are attractive (and you probably are, to somebody at least; your parents were) you should not expect that everyone will see you merely as a generic opponent. If it's not a tournament situation, do whatever you think is appropriate; yes, generally male Magic players *are* sexually repressed nerd-types and a harsh word will wilt us like daisies in the microwave. (There's lots of nicer ways to turn away unwanted attention though; reputations for being hurtful have a way of biting you later.) Or if you like the person, do what you wish; it's no-one else's business (except maybe your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouses') what consenting adults do. If it *is* a tournament situation, it's up to your own ethical standards, and those of the judges, but personally I would consider using sex appeal to gain an unfair advantage no *fairer* (although more pleasant) than any other sort of off-board tactics. Using sexual harassment, though, is just as bad as physical bullying in my opinion, and you really should tell the judge. For minor matters, it is really up to the opponent how to react to distractions, and being "undistractable" or at least not off-put is a good skill to develop. A pleasant chat makes a game a lot more fun (as well as making losing easier to take!). As for the biological/cultural thing: maybe it is more likely that men will take up Magic than women. So be it; who cares? If a female newbie chooses to take up Magic, for whatever reason, it is the responsibility of other Magic players to encourage and teach her, just as we should a male newbie. Conversely, it's her responsibility to be teachable, to play fair, to trade fair, to educate herself; just as we male players expect of each other. Statistics are irrelevant to individual cases. Professional status (for what that's worth, and personally I don't know, only one who has acheived it really does) is determined by the three factors of luck, play skill and deck-building skill, over time. There is absolutely no reason why a male, female or even a eunuch could not be the next World Champion; provided that that person is very skilled, and very lucky. And if the person is male, that's not his fault or yours, and you should not use his gender (or race, or collection size) as an excuse for why you did not win yourself. Regards, Darryl.